Rachael Kirkconnell Is Still ‘Sad’ About Matt James — But Now Knows She Needs an ‘Uplifting’ Partner

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It has been two months since Rachael Kirkconnell and Matt James’ split took fans by surprise — including Kirkconnell herself.

“I truly believe it came as a shock,” Kirkconnell, 28, shared with Us Weekly in an exclusive chat while promoting her new clothing line in collaboration with Showpo. “And I do believe that there might be some remorse regarding the breakup — or at least concerning how it was managed — and if I had to speculate, I’d say that’s likely the case on his part.”

Kirkconnell expressed that “part of the reason” the breakup remains “quite sad” is that it “didn’t need to unfold in that manner.” (Kirkconnell and James, 33, parted ways in early January when he initiated the breakup during a trip to Tokyo following an intense disagreement over where to dine.)

“It’s disheartening to reflect on now — four years later, that’s how things ended,” she added. “It’s not something to linger on, but I often ponder if I will always feel a bit disappointed about it.”

Nonetheless, Kirkconnell emphasized that she is focusing on moving ahead.

“I deeply believe that it was a hidden blessing and everything occurs for a reason, and that this was something necessary for my life,” she explained to Us. “I’m uncertain of the exact reason, but I trust it. I’m putting faith in the process. I’m doing well, and everything is fine. As unfortunate as it is, it happens for a purpose.”

Before their breakup, Kirkconnell and James had mentioned in various interviews that they were discussing marriage and future plans. Kirkconnell later disclosed on the “Call Her Daddy” podcast that James had told her he recognized she possessed traits that he didn’t envision in a future spouse.

Now, Kirkconnell is in pursuit of a relationship based on mutual respect.

“It’s essential to have not only compassion for your partner but also for yourself. And beyond compassion, it's crucial to ensure there is respect for both yourself and one another,” she shared with Us.

Kirkconnell noted that she has come to realize she wants a partnership where both individuals embrace each other “for who they truly are — flaws included.”

“And always to ensure you’re an encouraging partner,” she clarified. “I won’t generalize for all women, but personally, I can sometimes be quite self-critical or really tough on myself. Looking back, I question where that originated. I definitely seek a partner who is always uplifting and supportive of me.”

She further remarked: “Not that this is solely their role — I think it's important to find that support within yourself — but having someone who encourages you and lifts you up in the same way you do for them is imperative moving forward.”

Kirkconnell is entering a phase she refers to as her “Golden Era,” coinciding with her collaboration with Showpo.

“It consisted of either pieces that would look breathtaking in the golden hour or items that provide a great boost of confidence, with styles that are fun and trendy, yet also maintain a simplicity and sophistication that allow for versatility in how they are worn,” she detailed.

But will she be sporting the new outfits on the shores of Bachelor in Paradise? (The spinoff is scheduled to make a comeback this summer, and host Jesse Palmer has previously mentioned to Us that both Kirkconnell and James would be welcomed back to the show.)

“I’m not sure if I can date someone from the franchise again. I don’t know if I want to do that again,” Kirkconnell remarked when pressed by Us about her potential return. “Honestly, I’m not one to completely close any doors. That’s not my style, but it does seem a bit soon and I’m not sure I’m prepared for that.”

She recognizes that her collection features outfits suitable for a BiP rose ceremony, particularly the sheer white lace off-the-shoulder dress and the black strapless floral dress.

“Perhaps you won’t catch me on the shores of Paradise, but you might spot me on beaches somewhere else, perhaps vacationing solo in a dress,” she joked.

The collection showcases two cheetah-print designs—something Kirkconnell hopes Keke Palmer will wear—as well as various floral prints, alongside several choices in white.

“I have many friends currently in their bridal phase, so I’m eager to see them in all the white pieces. The white lace dress I mentioned for BiP, plus a shorter white dress with ruffles across the shoulders, is so lovely,” she shared. “I enjoy wearing white during spring and summer, so I anticipate using it frequently myself, but I would also love to see many girls donning white for their bachelorette parties or bridal showers.”